As long as you aren’t a sociopath, there’s a good chance you spend a lot of time in your head, thinking about all the dumb stuff you do.
Maybe you ruminate about the message you sent to the bachelorette party thread that no one ‘liked’ for the last half-hour, which obviously means the Kristen Wiig gif was somehow offensive and now everyone hates you. Or perhaps you can’t stop contemplating the way you kissed that hot Hinge date goodbye. Did you keep your eyes open? Your ex always said you kept your eyes open while kissing and it was “creepy.”
And let’s not get started on what an ass you made of yourself at last night’s company-sponsored happy hour. Did you really need that third margarita? Did you? Because today your head feels like it’s filled with glue and you’re pretty sure your boss and your boss’s boss didn’t find your Taco Bell food poisoning story charming. They probably hate you now, too.
If the above sounds like your typical stream of consciousness, I’ve got news for you: It’s okay. In fact, this is totally normal!
Arthur Brooks, the author of a column called “How to Build a Life,” writes that “in truth, you often think you are a lot messier than others think you are.” It’s simply the human condition to focus on our very worst characteristics. Social media doesn’t help. While some people make a big deal about posting unfiltered pictures and “photo dumps,” the reality is that even these are carefully curated representations of a person’s life.
Not present are the million and one unsexy, unsophisticated moments where you feel like a walking dumpster fire. I’m talking about yeast infections. Student loan debt. Generalized anxiety. Social anxiety. Separation anxiety—from your dog. The one you can’t afford because she’s allergic to the world. The kind of stuff that makes you take a good, hard look in the mirror and ask yourself: Why?
If you’re like me, the only cure for these ever-present feelings of insecurity and neuroticism—other than watching Love Island till my Apple Watch thinks I’m dead—is a good book. And not just any good book. A hot mess heroine book.
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Sorrow and Bliss, Meg Mason (Harper)
“When she was seventeen, a little bomb went off in her brain.” Martha Friel has struggled with undiagnosed mental illness most of her life but no doctor, drug or therapy has been able to fix her. This book is dark and funny and sharp as a razor’s edge. I couldn’t put it down—or stop rooting for Martha.
Queenie, Candice Carty-Williams (Gallery/Scout Press)
Twenty-five-year-old Queenie Jenkins is having a rough go of it: Casual and systemic racism in the workplace. A messy breakup. A mental breakdown.
As Queenie starts making bad decision after bad decision, you’ll temporarily want to throw the book against the wall. Don’t. Hang around for Queenie’s beautiful friendships, her fight, and ultimately, her redemption.
Wahala, Nikki May (Custom House)
Why have one hot mess heroine when you can have three? In Nigerian culture, “wahala” means “trouble.” So sets the stage for this delightfully messy novel about three Anglo-Nigerian besties navigating friendship, motherhood, ambition and betrayal.
This book is juicy; so many twists and turns, I had whiplash by the last page.
Ghosts, Dolly Alderton (Vintage)
I’m pretty sure I’ve recommended this book to every single woman in my life and I take it as a personal affront if they don’t immediately read it and then text me. This romantic comedy (and I don’t even like romantic comedies!) will make you laugh, cry and wish that Nina Dean was one of your girlfriends so you could invite her over for a glass of wine and some tea-spilling.
Writers & Lovers, Lily King (Grove Press)
Other than her mother’s sudden death, Casey Peabody’s life sounds eerily similar to my early twenties: disastrous relationship, crummy apartment, waitressing gig, zero money and a truly unhinged belief that one day, I will write a book and get it published.
So of course I had to read this, and man, did Lily King deliver (does she ever not?)
Beautiful World, Where Are You, Sally Rooney (Picador)
“I love that about humanity, and in fact it’s the very reason I root for us to survive — because we are stupid about each other.” My favorite line in Beautiful World is from an email our protagonist Alice sends to her best friend Eileen, and it’s basically an ode to what hot messes we humans are.
Despite living on an increasingly unviable planet, we’re all still wondering…but does he like me?
Luster, Raven Leilani (Picador)
Edie, our protagonist, has taken a backseat to her life. She works an admin job she’s not passionate about and engages in casual hookups that leave her feeling empty inside. When the wife of one such hookup welcomes Edie into their home to act as a mentor to their adopted daughter, Edie’s situation goes from chaotic to fully unhinged.
Roxane Gay said it best: “I’m really glad my twenties are over.”
Mostly Dead Things, Kristen Arnett (Tin House)
I never thought I would love a book where taxidermy plays such a central role, but here we are. Jessa-Lynn Morton struggles to manage her family’s taxidermy business in the wake of her father’s suicide while the rest of the Morton clan falls apart.
In Arnett’s deft hands, this wonderfully weird book comes alive like a Floridian swamp at night.
Joan Is Okay, Weike Wang (Random House)
I laughed out loud countless times reading from the point of view of Joan, a thirty-something ICU physician at a bustling New York City hospital. Joan is very good at her job but very bad at human connection. When her mother returns from China after her father’s sudden death, Joan must confront social and cultural expectations that clash up against the place Joan feels safest: the confines of her white coat.
Olga Dies Dreaming, Xóchitl González (Flatiron)
Sometimes, a person’s absence shapes your life more than their presence ever could. As a successful wedding planner for elite Manhattanites, Olga Acevedo’s life looks pretty rosy on the surface. But behind the glitzy parties and television segments, Olga leads a solitary existence where she keeps potential suitors at arm’s length and grapples with longstanding family secrets and abandonment issues from her mother.
Start for the most gorgeous book cover ever. Stay for the illuminating unpacking of what the American Dream really means.